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Daily Deviation
Daily Deviation
May 3, 2013
Poetree by =MirachRavaia Form poetry mixed together to create a beautiful image, this piece can be read in many directions.
Featured by BeccaJS
Literature Text
NOTE: The poem should have the shape of a tree, but the new dA layeout messed it up. Please follow the link in the author's comments to see it in its intended form. Thank you!
In darkness sweet I dream I sleep; my fate to wait till time is ripe
A tender leaf curled in the seed, an idea that would be freed
I dream of branches: branches tall; for the stars bright to play in night
Of my crown reaching to the clouds, my leaves of light a splendid sight
It's time to wake, whispers the sun, stretch as you please the sleepy leaves
I'll bask in light and drink the rain, the sap will flow, it's time to grow
When cold and draught will set their snare, I'll have the will to persevere
From little seed a mighty tree: a dream come true for all to see
Like fairy-fingers delicate In sleepy summer afternoon In autumn like a mourning queen
are branches thin that sprout in spring when bees are busy buzzying 'round while taking leave of every leaf
and through the winds of winter wait the branches hum with silent tune she gives farewell to summer's green
to open like a gentle wing like gold and honey is that sound so proud and solemn in her grief
The branches thin that sprout in spring The bees are busy buzzying 'round She's taking leave of every leaf
and buds with leaves, shy little palms a soft purr of a content day that with stream of time flows away
will open like a gentle wing like gold and honey is that sound so proud and solemn in her grief
and sing with wind its rustling psalms when in warm breeze the branches sway until just naked branches stay
The buds with leaves, shy little palms A soft purr of a content day With stream of time leaves flow away
a new life of an ancient stem when air and light are both like one like summer's small funeral boats
will sing with wind its rustling psalms and in warm breeze the branches sway until just naked branches stay
as seeping sap gives strength to them under clouds chasing with the sun in time that ever forwards floats
A new life of an ancient stem When air and light are both like one Like summer's small funeral boats
and branches reaching for the sky branches are reaching for the sky something is lost and something stays
as seeping sap gives strength to them for the clouds chasing with the sun, in time that ever forwards floats
for all the seasons that fly by and all the seasons that fly by in centuries just like in days
Branches are reaching for the sky Something is lost and something stays
and stem is fortress against time, and stem is fortress against time,
for all the seasons that fly by for centuries just like for days
and for children to dream and climb and for children to dream and climb
The stem is fortress against time,
and in old age it will give shade
to the children that dreamt and climbed
in memories that never fade
In the old age it will give shade
and calm green silence under leaves
Those memories will never fade
when winter comes and summer leaves
The calm green silence under leaves
and darkness of soil, soft and warm
when winter comes and summer leaves
the roots will withstand every storm
In darkness of soil, soft and warm In darkness of soil, soft and warm
like in a safe and secret womb the roots dream secret earthy dreams:
the roots will withstand every storm the roots that withstand every storm
so blooms in May may again bloom drinking from cool underground streams
Like in a safe and secret womb The roots dream secret earthy dreams The roots dream secret earthy dreams
they through the winds of winter wait while branches hum with silent tune about farewell to summer's green
so blooms in May may again bloom drinking from cool underground streams drinking from cool underground streams
Like fairy-fingers delicate in sleepy summer afternoon in autumn like a mourning queen
In darkness sweet I dream I sleep; my fate to wait till time is ripe
A tender leaf curled in the seed, an idea that would be freed
I dream of branches: branches tall; for the stars bright to play in night
Of my crown reaching to the clouds, my leaves of light a splendid sight
It's time to wake, whispers the sun, stretch as you please the sleepy leaves
I'll bask in light and drink the rain, the sap will flow, it's time to grow
When cold and draught will set their snare, I'll have the will to persevere
From little seed a mighty tree: a dream come true for all to see
Like fairy-fingers delicate In sleepy summer afternoon In autumn like a mourning queen
are branches thin that sprout in spring when bees are busy buzzying 'round while taking leave of every leaf
and through the winds of winter wait the branches hum with silent tune she gives farewell to summer's green
to open like a gentle wing like gold and honey is that sound so proud and solemn in her grief
The branches thin that sprout in spring The bees are busy buzzying 'round She's taking leave of every leaf
and buds with leaves, shy little palms a soft purr of a content day that with stream of time flows away
will open like a gentle wing like gold and honey is that sound so proud and solemn in her grief
and sing with wind its rustling psalms when in warm breeze the branches sway until just naked branches stay
The buds with leaves, shy little palms A soft purr of a content day With stream of time leaves flow away
a new life of an ancient stem when air and light are both like one like summer's small funeral boats
will sing with wind its rustling psalms and in warm breeze the branches sway until just naked branches stay
as seeping sap gives strength to them under clouds chasing with the sun in time that ever forwards floats
A new life of an ancient stem When air and light are both like one Like summer's small funeral boats
and branches reaching for the sky branches are reaching for the sky something is lost and something stays
as seeping sap gives strength to them for the clouds chasing with the sun, in time that ever forwards floats
for all the seasons that fly by and all the seasons that fly by in centuries just like in days
Branches are reaching for the sky Something is lost and something stays
and stem is fortress against time, and stem is fortress against time,
for all the seasons that fly by for centuries just like for days
and for children to dream and climb and for children to dream and climb
The stem is fortress against time,
and in old age it will give shade
to the children that dreamt and climbed
in memories that never fade
In the old age it will give shade
and calm green silence under leaves
Those memories will never fade
when winter comes and summer leaves
The calm green silence under leaves
and darkness of soil, soft and warm
when winter comes and summer leaves
the roots will withstand every storm
In darkness of soil, soft and warm In darkness of soil, soft and warm
like in a safe and secret womb the roots dream secret earthy dreams:
the roots will withstand every storm the roots that withstand every storm
so blooms in May may again bloom drinking from cool underground streams
Like in a safe and secret womb The roots dream secret earthy dreams The roots dream secret earthy dreams
they through the winds of winter wait while branches hum with silent tune about farewell to summer's green
so blooms in May may again bloom drinking from cool underground streams drinking from cool underground streams
Like fairy-fingers delicate in sleepy summer afternoon in autumn like a mourning queen
Literature
All the Things You Never Knew
It was your favorite thing to say. “We know everything about each other. Not just the good things, but even the bad ones. We have no secrets.” And the way your eyes lit up when you said it, how your arm would curl around my shoulders and squeeze me against you… I couldn’t say anything. I promised myself that I would when we were alone, but the moment always seemed wrong and eventually the fact that I still had secrets became a secret itself.
It turns out I wasn’t the only one.
I never told you about the crying or the cutting or the nights I spent awake staring at the bottle of pills. I was terrified it would b
Literature
I Belong To You
I hate rain. Not really, I love it. Just not when the most beautiful, perfect, wonderful, perfect, comfortable, waterproof, perfect coat in existence has been savagely butchered by my so-called friend’s Dalmatian. Every slap of rain on my naked arms is a stinging reminder of the irreparable hole in my wardrobe.
Some people might try to fill the void with lesser coats but I can’t bring myself to betray Valentino, even after her death. Instead my slippery arms grapple with each other in wet shock as I stumble to the op shop, clinging to one last thread of hope. I know in my deadened heart that I’ll never have another co
Literature
Pines
The pines bend over
Crooked
Dark against a satin sky
Old and wind-twisted
Weary of winter
of going on
They stretch in a sweet spring sun
Stretch, straighten, and start over
pale new needles poke
out of paper-crisp wrappings
tender and soft
having never seen a winter
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The .jpg version: [link]
For the "Two forms, one theme" contest [link] (this took about a week to write)
The first form is Magali Shairi, and the second form is a pantoum.
The poem can be seen in more dimensions. From up to bottom, it follows the growth of a tree from seed, and then the tree itself from branches to roots. From left to righ it follows the tree in the cycle of seasons. And yes, it actually IS a tree in its form.
The Magali Shairi is read in lines, so I underlined the breaks in each verse when I wanted to adjust it to the shape of the tree, so you won't get confused in which direction to read. The lines also mark the cesura in the verse.
The rest is actually 3 pantoums, which can be read as a whole from up to bottom, with some parts common to two, or all of them.
About the whole poem, I would really appreciate some feedback from those of you who are native speakers. As English is not my first language, it's hard to me to distinguish if some formulations aren't awkward or overused - I rely on words I know to pronounce to make my rhymes.
For the "Two forms, one theme" contest [link] (this took about a week to write)
The first form is Magali Shairi, and the second form is a pantoum.
The poem can be seen in more dimensions. From up to bottom, it follows the growth of a tree from seed, and then the tree itself from branches to roots. From left to righ it follows the tree in the cycle of seasons. And yes, it actually IS a tree in its form.
The Magali Shairi is read in lines, so I underlined the breaks in each verse when I wanted to adjust it to the shape of the tree, so you won't get confused in which direction to read. The lines also mark the cesura in the verse.
The rest is actually 3 pantoums, which can be read as a whole from up to bottom, with some parts common to two, or all of them.
About the whole poem, I would really appreciate some feedback from those of you who are native speakers. As English is not my first language, it's hard to me to distinguish if some formulations aren't awkward or overused - I rely on words I know to pronounce to make my rhymes.
© 2013 - 2024 MirachRavaia
Comments111
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Overall Vision Originality Technique ImpactAmazing. Amazing, amazing, amazing. How is it that you are not native to English? You have a perfect grasp of it. Brilliant job...
The use of pantoum-like form is really nice and brings a sense of cycle or repetition in the tree's inner structure, and the Magali Shairi is the perfect prelude to the main body of work. I love how you branch off the pantoums and merge them together to represent the roots radiating out and the branches coming together. And a little detail that I like - usually self-rhyme is frowned upon, but the use of "leaves" in both the plural of "leaf" and the third-person present of "leave" is cool!
One tiny quibble: "wait" usually doesn't rhyme with "delicate" in most speech.
Other than that, excellent work.